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13 Things Men With Anxiety And Depression Want You To
Know
It's not a weakness.
Lindsay Holmes Healthy
Living Editor, The Huffington Post
Posted: 09/16/2015 07:00 AM
EDT | Edited: 09/16/2015 11:23 AM EDT
There's an obvious stigma
when it comes to men and mental health. Research suggests many men find it
difficult to disclose mental illness symptoms and a recent analysis found
that men are more likely not to speak up if they're having thoughts of
suicide. In a society where "being a man" is conflated with
being tough, it's hard for men to come forward and reveal they have a mental
health condition.
However, confidential
conversation is better than no conversation when it comes to mental health.
Recently, Ask Men anonymously surveyed male readers on what they wanted
everyone to know about dealing with mental health issues. Check out some of
their responses below, then share what you want people to understand about
anxiety and depression in the comments.
1. It's a health issue.
"It's a medical
problem."
2. It's important to open up about anxiety.
"It's OK to have those
feelings and wanting to talk about it is natural and healthy."
3. Men with anxiety are seen as "weak" --
and that's a problem.
"We, men, don't share
any problems that we face because we think it makes us vulnerable and weak.
Some have been taught to show that we are tough since childhood."
4. Lifestyle changes can help.
"Get out of it as soon
as possible. Change your habits ... go on a vacation, movies, blind dates. Make
new friends. Be positive."
5. Insensitive comments can sometimes stand in
the way of support.
"Pretending to
sympathize and saying things like 'toughen up,' 'it'll get better,' 'grow up,
you are acting so immature,' 'grow a pair' are all not as helpful as [people]
like to think it is. Perhaps they should consider observing people a little
more before commenting like that."
6. If you want to know more about what they're dealing
with, ask thoughtful questions.
"[A]sk questions that
are not judgmental in nature. Rather than asking 'how did you screw this up?'
consider how could this have gone better ... no need to repeatedly bring up
past failures."
7. Mental health issues can be all-consuming.
"It always hurts 24/7
when you are experiencing anxiety and depression."
8. Anxiety and depression don't discriminate.
"It's very real. It can
happen to anyone, any age and any gender. There is no switch to turn it off.
There is help you can give and receive."
9. The conditions can cause poor thoughts.
"It's a vicious cycle.
When you're suffering from it, one bad thought, event or interaction can be
enough to send you into destructive thinking patterns."
10. Treatment can make anxiety and depression
manageable.
"These are natural human
conditions, but it's better looking for professional help in case you can't
control them."
11. Mental illness is not just "all in your
head."
"[I]t's not something
for weak people, you can't just 'cheer up!' and it's okay and normal to talk
about."
12. It's important to identify -- and speak out --
about the symptoms.
"How you deal with it is
what matters. Usually the ones who undergo stress but don't show it in public
suffer the most. One should definitely see a [doctor if they] have trouble with
sleep, lack in focus, increased/decreased appetite as these are the initial signs."
13. Anxiety and depression should never make you feel
ashamed.
"Depression and anxiety
put you in a position where you have no control and feel very open, helpless
and vulnerable. As [men], we are constantly being told we have to be strong and
in control when we can barely get out of bed in the morning and every decision
takes all the focus and energy we have. It can add to the downward spiral.
Learn to ask for help and have someone to lean on, it will make your journey
out of that black place a little easier."
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